problem

The sad thing about a job, is that once you start get paid for doing it, it isn't fun any more. It is much more joyful to do a job just because, and not earn anything from it. I don't want to be paid for things like mowing the lawn and babysitting. That's silly. If I hated doing those things, THEN you could pay me for it, but I don't actually mind it at all. Its pay enough to be able to do it. Paying me for that would be like mom paying me to cook super. Now that is utterly ridiculous!

Mom doesn't understand that I don't want to offer to photograph people, cause I still need more expertise in it. Being asked to do it and offering to do it are two different things. When I offer to take photographs for someone, I have basically said that I am confidant that I am able to take the photograph that they want. When asked to take someones photos it isn't me a saying that I'm able to do it, but them saying that they trust me to try. I can't claim to be confidant that the photos I take will turn out nicely, cause many of them haven't. I need to understand the camera before I can feel confidant with it. I need to actually learn why some turn out and some don't. I don't learn well from reading thing on paper, though I can learn that way, but it takes longer to figure it out, however, if someone shows me how to do something, I catch on fairly fast, which is why I really, really wanted to take that class at the community college.

Ok, I guess those two paragraphs don't seem to really go together, but they actually have a connection somewhere in my mixed up mind.